I have had the moniker of “Mathoni” since age 14, when I decided I needed a pen name. I went searching for a cool yet obscure Book of Mormon name and the name has stuck with me since then. Or maybe I’ve stuck by it. Either way.

I’m 32 (nearly 33), live in Happy Valley, Utah with my wife of seven years and three children. I recently graduated from the University of Utah with a Masters in counseling psychology and work full time providing therapy to sex offender, domestic violence offenders and substance abusers and alcoholics. You know what? It’s actually fun and rewarding. It also gives me a very different view of people, including the many Latter-day Saints I meet who have these problems.

I was raised in the church and grew up in locations where the church was not as strong. As a result, it has been a relatively new experience for me to be around so many Mormons. A strange and bizarre experience, at that. Having lived here for five years, I have come to appreciate the finer points of living in Utah, but I have been well aware of the weaknesses of the culture here.

As a result, even though I enjoy commenting and pondering gospel doctrine, as often as not, I end up commenting on the intersection between culture and doctrine. Doctrines may be pure, but people are strange and frustratingly stubborn. And we have free choice. Among five different people, one can find at least five differing interpretations of any given doctrine.

A testimony came with hard work and prayer when I was about 14. In the ensuing years, I found that keeping my testimony has taken a lot more work. Like a garden, without constant attention, effort and weeding, a testimony will wither and die. Mine in particular seems to need constant nourishment, in the form of deeper, more thought-provoking information. The “basics” are important, and I would never denigrate their importance, but I also enjoy reading/investigating more difficult, challenging works. This includes the works of the great Mormon researchers/historians (B. H. Roberts, Hugh Nibley, etc.), but also the work of those from other “branches” of the gospel and even anti-Mormons.