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Civil Unions: A Rose By Another Name?

By: The Baron

Lisa Simpson: A rose by any other name smells as sweet
Bart Simpson: Not if you call them 'Stench Blossoms'!

The great big elephant in the room with California Proposition 8--which both sides seemed determined to ignore—is that California has had a domestic partnership law on the books since 2005, and which remains unaffected by Prop 8’s passing.

How do domestic partnerships—also termed ‘civil unions’—differ from marriage other than name?  Not by much.

In Vermont, for example, every question of the form “How is X handled under a civil union?” is answered, basically, by “the same as with a marriage”.  Nothing is different but the name.

In California, there are a few minor differences (you have to be 18 to form a domestic partnership, for example, and have to be living together, whereas marriages are less strict as far as age and residence). Nothing major, though—certainly nothing that would justify the oft-heard notion that the passage of Prop 8 “destroys gay families”.   In reality, the rights of gay couples in California are just about the same today as they were the day before the election.  (Domestic partnerships are actually easier to apply for, and easier to end, than marriages.) 

The existence of domestic partnerships in California raises some key questions:

To those who opposed Prop 8:  why was it so important that Prop 8 fail, since the status of gay couples regarding state government benefits and recognition under domestic partnerships is virtually the same in California as they would be under the name “marriage”?  What’s the big deal?

To those who supported Prop 8:  why was it so important that Prop 8 succeed, since the status of gay couples regarding state government benefits and recognition under domestic partnerships is virtually the same in California as they would be under the name “marriage”?  Wouldn’t the same proposed fallout of gay marriage (loss of freedom of religion, teaching about gay partnerships in schools, etc…) still happen under government recognized civil unions?  If not, why not?  Again, what’s the big deal?

Rephrasing the question: how much of the gay marriage debate centers exclusively and entirely around the word ‘marriage’?  How much of the battle is of a purely symbolic value, in other words--where actual benefits are not in question, only terminology?

Are Prop 8 supporters okay with some kind of benefits for gay couples, as long as the name ‘marriage’ is not attached?  After all, the passing of the domestic partnership law in California in 2005 didn't cause nearly as much political response.  We may find out, as a number of civil union initiatives, including Utah, are currently under preparation.

How should Church members respond to civil unions?  If there are actual societal consequences that come from recognizing gay couples in an official manner (in regards to children, or religious freedom, etc...), wouldn’t those still happen under civil unions?  Or is the name ‘marriage’ all that matters?

Imagine, if you will, a law that says that abortions are now illegal, but women have access to a new procedure called a ‘uteral cleasing’ which consists of ‘removing a fetus and any accompanying tissue from the confines of the uterus’.   Would pro-lifers be satisfied with such a law? (Because, after all, it’s not an “abortion”--those are illegal now.  I suspect not...)
 
As it develops, the issue of civil unions will probably serve a useful purpose in clarifying why people support or oppose gay marriage in the first place.  If you support gay marriage, are civil unions not good enough?  If not, why not?  What’s so important about the word ‘marriage’?  If you oppose gay marriage, is it because you believe official recognition of gay couples is bad for society in some way, or is it just because of the name?  What’s so important about the word ‘marriage’?

Print | posted on Wednesday, November 19, 2008 1:04 PM | Filed Under [ The Baron General Politics Family Theology ]

Comments:

#1: jm

And... if they pretty much differ only in name, then why the big stink over gay marriage?
11/19/2008 2:44 PM

#2: KingOfTexas

Can you get a temple recomend if you watch the Simpsons? :)
11/19/2008 3:09 PM

#3: Eric Nielson

Hmmm.

I expect someone will come by and claim there are many, large differences between the two.
11/19/2008 3:16 PM

#4: SilverRain

I suspect it has something to do with what wars are won and which are lost. Besides, the accepted definition or usage of a word is far more significant than some people might think. Ponder that when you eat pork or beef, or when you purchase a "personal hygiene product" or use the word "fudge" as an expletive. Even if the only reason the Prophet asked members to support the proposition was over a single word, that is no small thing.
11/19/2008 6:56 PM

#5: Stephen M (Ethesis)

I still wonder about a lot of those things.
11/19/2008 7:41 PM

#6: Jack

Baron,

I think your abortion analogy would work better if the fetus had the power to consent to it's own death.
11/19/2008 9:10 PM

#7: Nate W.

I will say that there are not large differences between the two, but yet, it is a big deal. This debate is not about hospital visits, or the right to preach against homosexuality, or anything like that. None of that will be affected by prop 8 one way or another. This is only about whether gay unions are called marriage or domestic partnerships. It is about the meaning of one word. Let me tell you why one word is important.

When prop 8 passed, gays still had legally recognized unions in the state of California, with all the rights and responsibilities of marriage. They just aren't called marriage. Why? What is the motivation of a state to have one institution for opposite-sex couples and another for same-sex couples when there's no functional difference between them? People for and against prop 8 agree on one thing: the word "marriage" is a symbol of something special. The only logical motivation to reserve the word for opposite-sex couples is that including same-sex couples will somehow take away the specialness of the word. So same-sex couples are segregated out of the institution of marriage not for a functional reason, but to signal that their relationships are different, and by the same token, lesser, than opposite-sex relationships. Passing prop 8 won't protect religious freedom; the only thing it will do is to make it clear that the state believes that gay relationships are not equal in dignity to straight relationships. That is a classic violation of equal protection written into the California Constitution. Because I am against that, I am opposed to proposition 8.
11/19/2008 9:15 PM

#8: The Baron

But just the fact that you phrase it in terms of "dignity" shows that it is, at heart, a purely symbolic struggle, no?

The point with a comparison to abortion is that it is not a symbolic struggle--no one opposed to abortion would accept a 'uteral cleansing' in place of abortion, because they are opposed to what abortion is, not simply the word itself. (Likewise, the pro-abortion side wouldn't bat an eye at 'abortion' being illegal while 'uteral cleansings' being available, because they also care only about the substance, not the name)

Changing the name doesn't change anything in the abortion debate, but strangely it does seem to change the gay marriage debate, which is interesting...
11/20/2008 12:09 PM

#9: Jeremy

"So same-sex couples are segregated out of the institution of marriage not for a functional reason, but to signal that their relationships are different, and by the same token, lesser, than opposite-sex relationships."

What token are you referring to? Just because same-sex unions are disallowed the title of "marriage" in no way means they are lesser...just different. Similarly, states don't allow siblings to enter into contractual marriage, nor minors, for that matter. Should we fight for their rights? Clearly not. If these individuals decide, nonetheless, decide to enter into a relationship, the state is prohibited from giving them a marriage license. This isn't because their relationship is lesser, but that it is different than what the law allows.

According to current Constitutional law, laws that prohibit a class of adults from marrying (including same-sex) can be invalidated unless the government can demonstrate that the law is narrowly tailored to promote a compelling or overriding, or, at least, important interest. The family unit, including a mother and a father, is the building block of human society, and a majority of citizens from CA confirmed this. Clearly this constitutes a compelling interest.

The token you are referring to does not "lessen" a same-sex union, but instead simply protects what has and ever will be the core of humanity.
11/20/2008 2:18 PM

#10: Jeremy

Sorry, I missed this before,

"What is the motivation of a state to have one institution for opposite-sex couples and another for same-sex couples when there's no functional difference between them?"

As far as I know, homo sapiens are not capable of asexual reproduction. This is a categorical imperative, as defined by Emanuel Kant. Without getting into the details, the "functional differences" are blatantly obvious, and provide foolproof fodder for governments to provide the legally required compelling interest.
11/20/2008 2:24 PM

#11: Nate W.

Baron:

But just the fact that you phrase it in terms of "dignity" shows that it is, at heart, a purely symbolic struggle, no?


Symbolic, yes--but the word marriage is a symbol that plays an important part in creating societal norms that directly affect how gays and lesbians are treated in society.

When thinking of symbolic segregation, think of two examples--water fountains and restrooms. One part of Jim Crow laws was the offering of "separate but equal" water fountains. Let's pretend for the sake of this hypothetical, that the water fountains were exactly equal. That would still not be OK because the purpose of this segregation is to send the message that African-Americans were less than Whites. In this example, no functional rights were being denied to African-Americans, but the symbol was an important way of the law propping up a system of social hierarchy of white over black.

The counter-example to that is sex-segregated restrooms. These are also separate-but-equal accommodations, but the segregation is based on a legitimate concern for privacy and, most can agree, not motivated by a desire to reaffirm patriarchy (although I am sure that some argument can be made to that effect). This type of segregation is legitimate because it does not have that symbolism attached to it.

The question is then, is same-sex marriage more like segregated water fountains or restrooms? Once upon a time, I think the answer was restrooms. When marriage was an agreement between a husband and a father, same-sex marriage would make no sense. When women were not equal to men, same-sex marriage would make no sense. When children constituted economic assets rather than just moral assets, same-sex marriage would make no sense. However, none of these is true anymore. Because California gives all of the rights and responsibilities of marriage to same-sex couples, it invalidates the reasoning that there is some legitimate reason for withholding the name as well. The only reason left is symbolic. That is a symbol that gays are less than straights, and it's a symbol that the government cannot and should not promote.

Jeremy:

If these individuals decide, nonetheless, decide to enter into a relationship, the state is prohibited from giving them a marriage license. This isn't because their relationship is lesser, but that it is different than what the law allows.


Doesn't that statement assume that because it's the law, it should be the law? Maybe I'm misreading you,

The family unit, including a mother and a father, is the building block of human society, and a majority of citizens from CA confirmed this. Clearly this constitutes a compelling interest.


The problem is that the existing law has to be narrowly tailored to achieve that interest. When gays can adopt and have all the same rights and responsibilities of marriage, it is clear that the existing law isn't achieving the putative interest of "protecting the family." Besides, there would have to be compelling evidence that if same-sex marriage were allowed, that the family unit would be harmed. The evidence isn't there.

As far as I know, homo sapiens are not capable of asexual reproduction.


That's true, for what it's worth. But the existing California law allows same-sex couples to adopt and to have children through artificial insemination. Besides, if the interest were in promoting the bearing of children, the narrowly tailored solution would be to ban birth control. There are legitimate concerns raised here--I just don't think your reasoning misses a link--why same-sex marriages harm the functions of marriage you are talking about.
11/20/2008 4:46 PM

#12: KingOfTexas

Dignified sinning hummm… Oh; that’s different “Go and sin some more.”
Armed robbery in a tux… only a misdemeanor.
Assault; not a crime as long as you don’t dress like a clown. (not dignified)
Heck I wear a suit all the time I can do anything any time I want with dignity. I only did this to show how silly the idea is.
11/23/2008 3:53 PM

#13: Paul North


The debate about whether homosexual human beings should have the same rights as heterosexual human beings is utterly absurd. I recommend reading the most famous phrase of the U.S. Declaration of Independence:

"We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness."

Any questions?

My proposal solution is the following (not too far from what The Baron is, in my view, wrongly criticizing): let's keep the term "marriage" for heterosexuals and let's call it "mauriage" for homosexuals. That way everybody can be happy. Heterosexualists can keep their "marriage" "sacred" and homosexuals can freely pursue their happiness without being discriminated against.

Any objections to this elegant solution? No? Ok, then let's get it enacted. If possible through a constitutional amendment.

12/1/2008 5:46 PM

#14: The Baron

The debate about whether homosexual human beings should have the same rights as heterosexual human beings is utterly absurd.


You're right--because every gay person in every state of the US has the same rights as every non-gay person already. Wait, is that what you meant?


let's keep the term "marriage" for heterosexuals and let's call it "mauriage" for homosexuals. That way everybody can be happy. Heterosexualists can keep their "marriage" "sacred" and homosexuals can freely pursue their happiness without being discriminated against.


Substitute "civil unions" for "mauriage" and that's pretty much what we already have...
12/2/2008 7:31 AM

#15: Paul North

To The Baron:

I take it that your comment means that you agree that "every gay person in every state of the US" SHOULD HAVE "the same rights as every non-gay person".

The fact is that homosexual citizens cannot marry the partner of their choice. Nor can they form civil unions, except for five states that allow such unions.

I am sure you find it outrageous that in fact 45 states have to change their laws to give all people the basic right to choose their life partner so that "every gay person in every state of the US has the same rights as every non-gay person".

Unfortunately that is not what we "already" have ...

But if we take the wisdom of the Founding Fathers seriously (which has always served us well), we should do everything to make at least civil unions with truly free choice of the partner the law of the land and an immutable right.
12/6/2008 10:36 PM

#16: KingOfTexas

To Paul North:
if we take the wisdom of the Founding Fathers seriously (which has always served us well), we should do everything to make at least civil unions with truly free choice of the partner the law of the land and an immutable right.

I would be more concerned with the commands of our Heavenly Father (which is right)
12/9/2008 5:03 PM

#17: Paul North

To King of Texas:

I am confused. You ask the question, "which is right" ... and then do not reveal which Heavenly Father you are talking about: yes, it is a very good question: "Which of the Heavenly Fathers known to mankind is right?"

Could you please tell me which of the 2,850 deities known so far you refer to, so that I can try to answer whether it is reasonable for a reasonable person to "be more concerned with the commands of [your particular favorite] Heavenly Father".

For a (surely non-comprehensive) list of the deities, you can e.g. go to http://www.godchecker.com/. (Although I find the title of the site offputting, but the list is quite useful.)

I am sure you are not suggesting to just blindly follow any of the 2,850 deities.

I will be most happy to continue the dialogue with regard to the deity and its commands you are referring to.
12/11/2008 5:09 PM

#18: KingOfTexas

You don't know the true God and you want to correct my grammer. Ain't you funny? :)
12/16/2008 7:45 PM

#19: Paul North


To KingOfTexas:

Do you know the true God? If yes, could you elaborate as to who it is and how you know it is the true God? Thank you. I am always learning and would like to learn more about what you think.

What was your reference regarding "grammer" about?
12/21/2008 10:57 PM

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